Happy Holidays & Seasons Greetings!
Today we take another step into our mythical adventure, as the goblins arrive to teach us a little bit about the nature of how human beings relate to the world. To do this, we need to first address….just what is a goblin?
Goblins:
Goblins can be found within folklore way back in the Middle Ages. A presence in the west, eastern Europe, and expanding all the way into Asia. Despite their vast presence within the human communities, their personality and people’s opinions of the goblin species is diversified.
For those of us who live within western civilizations, our experience with goblins most likely has been a toxic one. Their representation in modern literature and culture has portrayed goblins as: small, grotesque, greedy, vengeful, and malicious. They are known as thieves and harmful destructors of property.
But is that their full story?
When I came up with the idea for our Christmas countdown, I called out to the mythical beings to be a part of this adventure. I also specified, that my intention was for this to be healing, helpful, and fun. The creatures that have stepped forwards to work with me have to be a vibrational match to my intentions….so how are the goblins here?
Well, goblins have more to their story, which I discovered when I expanded my research into more eastern mythology. Then a new image of the goblins began to emerge. Displaying goblins as: mischievous, helpers of chores and home protection, as well as this rogue personality. So who are they?
Goblins are similar to the #6 energy in numerology, all about – community and even responsibility. Within this world of polarity and energy/vibration it means that how the goblins relate to us humans is based upon where we are within the sliding scale of polarity. Which is why they have been associated with the lower class and the wealthy.
“Ugly” Goblins: are a vibrational match to those who are in the lower aspects of that #6 energy. Narcissistic, greedy, selfish, lacking compassion. In these instances, goblins display greedy, vengeful, and harmful personality traits.
Like the greed of wealthy, powerful people whose “abundance” comes at the expense of the lower class. However, in an interconnected Creation, where beings from other realms stop by, true abundance does not come at the expense of others in this way.
This means that goblins can also display strong high vibrational #6 energy. Being caretakers of the home and property. Aiding people with their chores and being spirits that at one time, in certain places, were called upon in prayer. Even with their mischievous trickster personality, we knew goblins to be an asset.
Human Beings & Communication:
In life we have the influence of higher and lower aspects of various forces. Like the #6 energy of community, we can see this displayed as a lack of connection or as a strong family network. To understand the importance of communication as it relates to us humans, we must first look at how our species relates to the world.
People are all about relationships.
Often we speak of relationships with regards to family, friends, a significant other, or maybe a co-worker. But in reality, humans are perception-based people. How we see, understand, and relate to the world influences everything. It is not the event but how we perceive it, which determines the quality of the experience. As a result, our life is based on our relationships.
How we relate to beliefs, values, activities, situations, personality traits, and also people, the planet, animals, and even nature. Our entire human experience is based upon our relationships. Therefore, our strength at relationship dynamics will play a massive role in how effective and happy we are in life.
Relationships + Love:
Creation has an ever-present heart: The Anahata. A heart that influences Spirit, guides the construction of Creation, and contributes to the birth of all of the realms and us souls. Therefore, love relates to all areas of our lives, just as the nature of relationships do.
The ancient Greeks coined these 10 categories of love. Breaking down how we relate to love based who and even what we are in a relationship with. A love of people: family, lover, friend. A love of ALL: unconditional love. But also love of self, love of what we do, and even hospitality love (#6 energy).
We as humans relate to the world based upon how we understand it, this shapes our relationships with all things, and even how love and other emotions manifest in our lives.
Relationships & Communication:
As we develop our understanding of what it means to be human and how we have our human experience, we further discover just how critical communication is in life. How we communicate determines if we will be known as those malicious goblins or if we will be called upon to help and be a part of community. Like the goblins, how we relate and choose to act in life will determine how we are known.
Yes, you can love someone. But if we don’t convey that emotion in an accurate manner, it can be true within us but absent within our collective world. Mother Earth is the external reality – our co-creation. For something to be real in the external world, we must convey it. In short, we must communicate well.
Communication is about relaying and receiving information. We gather information from word choice, tone of voice, facial expressions, and even the influence of culture. Healthy communication means speaking honestly and directly.
The Impact of Poor Communication:
As I said, for something to be real for all of us, we must share it within the external world. Communication is massively impacted by this fact. Yet, communication is a learned skill. As infants we listen, learn, and relay the speaking style of what we were raised with. But also like children, we can learn to form stronger communication skills.
For example…
– Fear & Anger are neighboring emotions. Fear can often come out sounding like anger. And we get most scared with those we love.
– There is no such thing as: overreacting. Each person’s response to a situation is based on their understanding of it.
– Avoid: “should”: denotes stupidity and is insulting. “make”: we can make cookies but people are free. Healthy boundaries are hard to maintain when we confuse what is and isn’t in our power to make happen. “try”: this stops a healthy vibration. We supply our effort or we don’t, to try is to keep a part of ourselves from devoting to what we’re doing.
Argument & Healthy Communication:
For us, we are experiencing life from within. We sit upon our internal thrones viewing the world through lenses that are accurate and inaccurate or at the very least, not the full picture. However, we can still navigate life well and have lasting relationships by learning about how humans relate to one another.
Thankfully, there are many scientists who have spent decades researching this very topic. People such as Dr. John & Julia Gottman, whose research into romantic relationships can also be utilized in platonic relationships.
The research shows us that arguments do not make or break a relationship. But rather how and why we argue. This means that we can safely disagree with people, fall into confusion, and even have have ruptures, while still having healthy communication and relationships.
The truth is, human relationships are not designed to be perfect. Which means we can have healthy, long-lasting, deep, intimate, and even safe relationships while still experiencing argument, disagreement, or that rupture: feeling we lost that sense of connection. In reality, rupture will happen for all of us. As a result, a lack of rupture, conflict, or argument is not what makes a relationship good.
It is about: repair. How quickly is it handled? How much trust is there that you can repair? Is there generosity when human error and diversity/uniqueness rears it’s head and causes ruptures? Can I trust that you are taking my best interest to heart, so you’re willing to work on these ruptures?
The Research:
When scientists studies couples there was an old idea, that the amount a couple fought determined whether or not they stayed together. But, the research shows that it’s not about how much but rather how a couple argues which determines if they are healthy, safe, strong, and stay together. If you are seeking a healthy, safe, strong, and lasting relationship and you find yourself in a moment of conflict, ask yourself…
What is your goal?
When we experience a rupture, we are two people on opposite sides of a divide. Imagine this divide as an earthquake which has literally pushed the ground between us into a tall mound, dividing you and me. Now, this earthquake can be any sort of disagreement, the common ones being: money, raising kids, ethics, religion, etc. But the most common argument we have revolves around one question: Do you want me? Do you love me?
Now that we have a rupture, there is this thing/situation/perspective that divides us. If my goal is to win the argument….I will place myself above “us.” This results in dredging up the past, holding things over your head, insulting, criticizing, contempt, defensiveness, and stonewalling. To win, you and “we” have become collateral damage, resulting in an unsafe environment that most likely will result in an end of relationship.
But….what if my goal is not to win, but to get to the other side of this rupture and re-connect with you? This shifts all of my priorities to where the thing dividing us is not the most important, nor is my winning. It’s not about blame/fault or punishment…it’s about coming back together.
Healthy Relationships + Clear & Honest Communication:
Humans relate to the world through relationships. We can improve the quality of our relationships when we have better communication; a skill we can all learn. Through honesty, forthright, and generous word choice and attitude we can create an environment where others feel safe with us.
Dr. Brene Brow provides us the elements to trust through her acronym: BRAVING. Where G, stands for generosity – giving people the benefit of the doubt.
The Gottman Institute provides us a plethora of books, interviews, and over 40 years scientific results to guide us in relationships.
Just because we are human doesn’t mean we are born with a manual like the bubble bee, telling us how to live within our hive. One of the things that will happen to all of our relationships is ruptures/arguments. It is how soon and how we address them, which will determine if we are in strong and safe relationships. Repair is what offers us the ability to engage in an elevate human experience.
The goblins have been working with humans in relationship to social relationships and community for centuries. They are here with us today, to strengthen our own understanding and abilities when it comes to the health and wealth of our relationships. Call upon them, as our ancestors did, for help in home protection and family function.
I look forward to seeing you guys tomorrow as we meet a new mythical being and learn from them!